Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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