dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
