I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
