On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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