i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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