I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
