WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
