i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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