it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize
