just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
It was like getting head from an anaconda
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
