i just wanna soil my oats bro
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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