Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
