I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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