alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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