when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Randomize
