I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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