What a fucking waste of an outfit
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize