it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
