i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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