I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Farmville is her only friend.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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