How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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