Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
