i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Someone came in the potted fern
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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