So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
My ATM looks so different sober.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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