Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
