Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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