Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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