just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
