You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
