I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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