My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
They took my balls.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
