Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
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