i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
