This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
