we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
