It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
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I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
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being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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