It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
