I just cut my nipple shaving
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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