Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
