Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Randomize
