Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.