Texts From Last Night

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  (209): View more from California

  dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity

  (1-209): View more from California

  nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all

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  (209): dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity (1-209): nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all http://tfl.nu/t93h
  Replies (43) Good night (15438) Bad night (1652) Order T-Shirt
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.

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  (203): thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number. http://tfl.nu/71o2
  Replies (28) Good night (1516) Bad night (4570) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(

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  (732): the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :( http://tfl.nu/7drn
  Replies (19) Good night (1073) Bad night (6498) Order T-Shirt
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.

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  (304): There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year. http://tfl.nu/n54w
  Replies (23) Good night (4608) Bad night (672) Order T-Shirt
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it

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  (603): my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it http://tfl.nu/xy2b
  Replies (3) Good night (2767) Bad night (979) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy

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  (678): I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy http://tfl.nu/r472
  Replies (11) Good night (4351) Bad night (712) Order T-Shirt
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.

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  (321): No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds. http://tfl.nu/z7lt
  Replies (4) Good night (844) Bad night (1965) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.

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  (303): Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us. http://tfl.nu/6nta
  Replies (12) Good night (635) Bad night (1652)
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  (760): View more from California

  She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.

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  (760): She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid. http://tfl.nu/c9kh
  Replies (2) Good night (487) Bad night (1275) Order T-Shirt
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  (420): View more from

  It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.

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  (420): It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own. http://tfl.nu/cuwi
  Replies (6) Good night (1378) Bad night (331) Order T-Shirt
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  (972): View more from Texas

  I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.

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  (972): I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards. http://tfl.nu/fq92
  Replies (8) Good night (1541) Bad night (427) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti

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  (610): We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature (610): Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti http://tfl.nu/iam9
  Replies (1) Good night (975) Bad night (434)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.

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  (410): If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board. http://tfl.nu/zly7
  Replies (4) Good night (819) Bad night (388) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.

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  (+44): Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking. http://tfl.nu/zbnj
  Replies (6) Good night (886) Bad night (650) Order T-Shirt
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Let's get weird.

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  It's 10 am...

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm assuming that means you're not busy...

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  (920): Let's get weird. (608): It's 10 am... (920): I'm assuming that means you're not busy... http://tfl.nu/aihn
  Replies (3) Good night (1261) Bad night (205)

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