Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
