But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
