found the other keg... it's in the tree
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
