Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
