nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
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