i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
