3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize