I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
