she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize