He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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